Skip to main content

tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  August 10, 2015 11:34pm-12:38am PDT

11:34 pm
william shakespeare the potsmo here's a fun one, to be or not to be? william spaik shakespeare, the pot smoker? according to an article published in the independent, four tobacco pipes found in the apply write's garden tested positive for can bus. weed might not have been a term for marijuana in the 16th and 17th centuries. but have fun with that story. >> that's going to do it for us. thank you for joining us. bye! ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests --
11:35 pm
chris meloni, luke bryan, and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 309, bloomington. >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, hey! please, hey! that was great. take a minute. take a minute. have a seat, welcome. what a hot crowd this is tonight. come on! [ cheers and applause ] >> we love you, jimmy! >> jimmy: now we've got to put
11:36 pm
on a good show. that's the only problem. yeah. yeah, we'll do it. >> steve: too much pressure. >> jimmy: we'll do it. welcome, everybody, to "the tonight show." this is it. you're here! [ cheers and applause ] and i need you! we're all in it together! this is fantastic. welcome, welcome to the show. it's going to be fun. now, here's what everyone is talking about. of course, the fight between donald trump and megyn kelly. after being accused of making sexist comments about republican debate moderator megyn kelly, trump went on cnn yesterday and said, "i cherish women, i want to help women." [ laughter ] then hillary was like, "well, you're really helping this woman. so, i've got to say thank you very much." [ laughter and applause ] doing a great job. and a top aide to donald trump says he quit the campaign this weekend because of trump's public feuds, but trump said "he was fired." [ light laughter ] when asked what he was fired for, trump said "quitting. [ laughter ] you're fired for quitting, it's inexcusable." of course one of the highlights of last week's gop debate was
11:37 pm
when donald trump and rand paul got into a heated exchange. it was fantastic. can we look at a screen shot of that? yeah. [ laughter ] it got even weirder when their haircuts mated and they had a a litter of goldendoodles. [ laughter and applause ] can we see the picture again? that's how -- there it is, yeah. that's how you make goldendoodles. >> steve: that's how they make them. >> jimmy: that's how you make them. of course, in addition to the prime-time debate, they also held an earlier debate on fox news for some of the lower polling candidates. and one thing we noticed was that moderator martha maccallum asked some pretty complicated questions. i don't know if the candidates were ready for them. check this out. >> governor pataki, 45 million people in this country are on food stamps, 9 million are on disability. there's an increasing willingness in this country to accept assistance. do you believe that we should be encouraging people to get off of it? >> i think you need somebody who has -- >> this is a complicated situation. are you okay with us being on
11:38 pm
their side? >> i think the last eight years -- [ laughter ] >> which side do you believe we should be on? >> the answer is no. >> which side are you on? >> why me? [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: there you go. i mean -- very picky. also during the earlier debate, rick perry said that if he were elected, he would tear up the nuclear agreement with iran. yeah. but then obama had it laminated just to mess with him. [ laughter ] it was like, "aw, give me the scissors." and get this, before last week's republican debate, hillary clinton's staff told supporters to stock up on soft projectiles like marshmallows to throw at the candidates on tv. [ light laughter ] while chris christie's staff told the same thing to the live audience. [ laughter and applause ] num, num. num, num. num, num, num, num, num. [ applause ] fun. >> steve: hey! >> jimmy: also, i saw that president obama is on vacation in martha's vineyard for the next two weeks. ooh, yeah. critics say it makes america look weak.
11:39 pm
or at the very least kinda dorky. [ laughter and applause ] "the urkel has landed. i repeat, the urkel has landed." "did i do that?" [ laughter ] ooh, a little drama here. a little drama. in a new interview miley cyrus criticized taylor swift's video for "bad blood" saying it glorifies violence and revenge and added, "i don't see why boobs are worse than guns." [ light laughter ] they're not. [ laughter ] it's just that you shouldn't take out either one of them and randomly point them at people. that's the only thing -- that's the only thing i ask. [ applause ] no problem with it. only thing i ask. this is cool here. it's rumored that ozzy osbourne may be appearing in the upcoming "ghostbusters" movie. [ cheers ] of course, they had to use cgi to make him look less like a a ghost. [ laughter ] but it's still interesting. "sharon, get me out of this
11:40 pm
ghost trap!" [ laughter ] i don't know if you guys saw this, but there was a lot of controversy in india. [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: there was a lot of controversy in india recently after the government banned over 800 porn sites but then lifted the ban after just a a week. that's right. porn started back up after being gone for a week, or as we call that here in america, "lent." [ laughter and applause ] and finally, this is pretty interesting here. a new report claims that william shakespeare was a big marijuana user and may have been high when he wrote some of his plays. [ light laughter ] which explains that one line, "to be or not to be, wait, what was the question?" [ laughter ] we have a great show. give it up for the roots right there! ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
11:41 pm
♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! that saxophonist and four-time grammy nominee, boney james, sitting in with the roots tonight! [ cheers and applause ] my man, welcome, welcome to the show. his new album "futuresoul" spent ten weeks at number one on billboard's contemporary jazz chart. and you can catch him on tour right now. welcome, boney. good to see you, pal. >> thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you -- oh, please. boney james! guys, we're back. we're so happy to be back. we got a big week of shows
11:42 pm
coming up. tomorrow night, my pal kristen stewart will be here. [ cheers and applause ] plus, jim belushi and great music from yolanda adams. oh my goodness, tomorrow night she's gonna go crazy. [ cheers and applause ] oh wow, can't wait. >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: i love her. then later this week, ben kingsley, paul giamatti and kevin spacey are joining us. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: whoa! wow. >> jimmy: and we'll have performances from reba mcentire and robin thicke. [ cheers and applause ] i mean, that's is a hot week. >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: but first, we have a a fun, fun show tonight. we love it when he stops by, from the new film "the diary of a teenage girl," chris meloni is here. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh! >> jimmy: they love it. >> steve: oh, come on! >> jimmy: they love the meloni. >> steve: we me-love us some meloni. >> jimmy: chris and i are going to play a game of catchphrase. yeah, thank you. [ light laughter ] plus -- that was perfect. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: everyone -- ooh. >> steve: ooh, catchphrase. >> jimmy: yeah. it's a great crowd. this guy is one of the biggest names in country music.
11:43 pm
and you know what, he deserves it. he works his butt off, man. gosh, he's unbelievable. always backstage just signing records and stuff. still -- i was like -- he's just unbelievable, i love the guy. luke bryan is on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] we're going to talk with luke and he's going to perform his new single "strip it down" from his new album "kill the lights," which was number one on itunes this morning. so yeah, he's doing great. love that guy. >> steve: come on. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: luke bryan. guys, as i mentioned earlier, donald trump got in some hot water this weekend over some controversial remarks he made about fox news anchor megyn kelly. people are still talking about this. so earlier today, trump held a a press conference to explain what he meant as well as clarify some other remarks he's made recently. and we got footage. [ laughter ] >> steve: really? we got footage? no one else has the footage? >> jimmy: no, he gave it to us. >> steve: no news sources or anything? >> jimmy: yeah, his people gave it to "the tonight show." [ laughter ] to show -- he didn't want to
11:44 pm
give it to news sources. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: he doesn't trust anybody else. >> steve: right, doesn't trust 'em. doesn't trust the media. >> jimmy: i think. i don't know. i don't really know how we got our hands on this videotape. [ light laughter ] on videotape? on this hard -- somebody sent us the file. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: and we ended up with it. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: that's what we got. so would you guys like to see it? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: donald trump. take a look at this. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're welcome. you're welcome. you're welcome. look, i know everyone's all up in arms about the comments i made about megyn kelly after last week's gop debate, which by the way, i won easily. [ laughter ] i was fantastic. the ratings were huge. [ light laughter ] anyway, yesterday i called megyn kelly to personally not apologize. [ laughter ] when i said blood was coming out of her wherever, i
11:45 pm
obviously meant nose and ears. [ laughter ] if you think i was talking about something else, you're a a deviant. [ laughter ] i was not referring to hormones or menstruation. period. [ laughter and applause ] anyone who thinks otherwise is a total deviant. it's amazing how the media loves to twist my words. viciously attack me. it happens all the time. like last week, when i said my wife melania had the best melons in the world of course i meant her honeydew melons, which by the way, can't be beat. [ laughter ] only a deviant would think i was talking about her boobs, which by the way, are classy and fantastic. [ laughter and applause ] or the other day when i said to -- i said that carly fiorina had too much junk in the trunk. i obviously talking about the amount of stuff she keeps in
11:46 pm
the back of her hyundai sonata. [ laughter ] it's like a costco back there. she has a -- she has a case of those giant cans of juicy juice. you know, the ones that you have to open with a can opener on both sides. i prefer juice drinks that doesn't come in a paint can, okay? [ laughter ] deviant. [ applause ] or last month when i said i would love to have a foursome with katy perry, taylor swift, and nicki minaj. i was simply talking about golf. [ laughter ] which also explains why i said i'd love for them to wash my balls. [ laughter and applause ] deviant. deviant. okay? or when i said that me and gary busey like to do it doggie style. i just meant -- [ laughter ] i just meant that sometimes i'll toss a frisbee and he'll catch it in his mouth like a a dog. [ laughter and applause ] what else could that possibly mean? deviant. twisting my words.
11:47 pm
and finally, when i said i love fat tony's big greasy sausage and couldn't wait to get it in my mouth, how could you not know i was talking about my local butcher tony esposito and his quality meat products? deviants. [ cheers and applause ] now if you'll excuse me, i have to get back to the campaign trail and pound some bush. [ laughter and applause ] what? deviants! deviants! deviants! [ cheers and applause ] play the music! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ but why sign a two-year phone contract just to use them? at net10 wireless you can use the phone you already have. and keep your network and number too. for up to half the cost.
11:48 pm
only on the bring your own phone plan. that's wireless your way. now, get unlimited talk and text, plus 5gb of high-speed data, on the nation's largest, most dependable networks, for $50 a month. net10 wireless. i tried and then...breakfast made the bed/ had a swim/ scared the pants off of tim/ bought some tech off a blog/ met a bongo playing dog/ crunchy belvita breakfast biscuits are made with delicious ingredients and carefully baked to release 4 hours of nutritious steady energy morning win only pull 'n' peel let's you pull it, peel it, play it. fun never tasted so good with chewy, fruity pull 'n' peel candy from twizzlers. a good host, is a good host ♪ no matter where he's hosting. ♪ stella artois host beautifully
11:49 pm
irresistibly crispy bacon, of enticingly tender turkey, and deliciously rich guacamole together on freshly baked bread for one truly amazing sandwich: the new subway turkey & bacon guacamole. only at subway. is soh, she better not be.ld? our claim runs straight down to the glut'n free stuffin'. it's gluten. there's gold in them thar shells. liquid gold. it's a gold♪n opportunity to elevate each moment. hit every mark. ♪ thread every needle. ♪ turn every ride into a thrill ride. ♪ come in to the lexus golden opportunity sales event, where you'll find some of the best offers of the year on our most exhilarating models. lease the 2015 rc 350 for $449 a month for 36 months and we'll make your first month's payment. see your lexus dealer.
11:50 pm
11:51 pm
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, our first guest is a talented actor who stars opposite kristen wiig in the new film "the diary of a teenage girl" which is in select theaters now. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome chris meloni, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ]
11:52 pm
♪ >> jimmy: there you go. [ cheers and applause ] chris meloni, that's the way to make an entrance. you comin in that way -- ha ha! >> ha ha! >> jimmy: you look fantastic. >> thank you, sir. >> jimmy: looking good. like a laser beam. yeah you're like a laser beam. my friend, i haven't seen you in a couple of years. >> yes. i've been homeless. >> jimmy: no, no, no, no, no. you're here. you have a nice color. you have a tan. >> yes. baton rouge will do that to a a person. >> jimmy: oh, baton rouge. >> baton rouge. >> jimmy: absolutely, yeah. what are you in baton rouge for? >> i'm doing a series called "undergrounds" about the underground railroad. so, i'm riding around on horses
11:53 pm
and shooting guns. >> jimmy: horses. >> horses. >> jimmy: yeah, not horses. no, no, no. [ talking over each other ] how's baton rouge? >> you know, i've been there since april, and up until about mid-july, people would ask, "man, isn't it hot?" how are you doing down there? i'd be like, "i don't know what it is, but i guess i naturally acclimate to the heat really well." i left for five days, i came back and now all of a sudden it's like, "oh, this is real southern heat. like acting in a convection oven." [ laughter ] i'm like -- >> jimmy: it's the humid heat. >> you can't use an excuse. i feel like -- i go, "this is what the turkey feels like before you're about to -- it's hot." [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, it is hot hot hot. i haven't seen you in two years. the last time we were on "late night," in two years -- but nothing has really changed. >> no. >> jimmy: here is a picture in 2013. you were here.
11:54 pm
i had cut the tip of my finger off making salsa. [ laughter ] >> making salsa. >> jimmy: salsa, yeah. i was making salsa. i cut the tip of my finger off. which is the dumbest thing. don't make salsa. [ laughter ] it's sold everywhere. it literally -- i dare you to find a place where they don't sell salsa. they sell it at gas stations. wherever you go you can get salsa anywhere. yeah we have a vending machine in the hallway that sells salsa. [ laughter ] >> walmart. >> jimmy: walmart has the best salsa, yeah. i'm sorry, let's get back to the -- i want to talk about the look, the hair. you always a fan of long hair? did have you ever had long hair? as a kid growing up? >> yeah. when i was about 20, i went crazy. i went hog wild. i grew my hair from age 18 to about age 20. >> jimmy: you grew it for two years, it's so funny because we actually found a -- [ laughter ] >> let me just see it first. >> jimmy: no you can't see it first, no. we all have to experience this together. [ laughter ] it's that worth it.
11:55 pm
ready? here's a little 20-year-old or 19-year-old chris meloni. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my god! >> whoo doggy! >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. there's so many problems with this. >> okay, it's the cords, belt buckle, circa 1974. >> jimmy: what are the boots? >> those are "i want to be an indian but i'm just a white boy." >> jimmy: yeah. a renaissance there. >> that is my -- that's not mine. it's my mother's powder blue deuce and a quarter. electra, deuce and a quarter. >> jimmy: oh my gosh. >> with crushed valore seating. >> jimmy: i love you're acting like it's yours. you're leaning -- but also, who took the photo? you didn't want to move the leaves behind you? [ laughter ] go stand behind the leaves. >> good lighting. >> jimmy: good luck focusing this one. >> there's a lot in that picture. >> jimmy: yeah -- were you in a a band or something? >> i thought i was. in my head obviously. >> jimmy: and what's with the thumb tuck? [ laughter ]
11:56 pm
that's an interesting move, the thumb tuck. [ laughter ] [ applause ] what's up, man? hanging out? having a good time. >> good man. >> jimmy: cool, man. >> do you want a ride in my mom's buick electric -- [ talking over each other ] >> jimmy: let me get my boots. it will take me about a half hour to get them on. see you then man, cool -- cool, man. bye-bye. and scene. he has an app for it. [ applause ] that's why we love you. you're a great guest. you're a funny human being. gosh i watched "red hot american summer," i binged watched it on netflix, first day of camp, have you seen it yet? it's great. [ cheers ] >> have you seen it or not? raise your hand if you've seen it. >> jimmy: you can't see the crowd. >> i know, i'm just pretending. [ laughter ] you have to go see it, you have to see it on netflix. go ahead. >> jimmy: you have to go see it. no, it comes to you. netflix comes to you. [ grunts ] nothing's working. i'm not trying to make you angry. no, no, no. gosh, you were so funny in that
11:57 pm
thing. >> thanks man. >> jimmy: unbelievably great. and the whole cast bringing everyone back together must have been a fun thing. molly shannon, you guys do a a great bit. that's just so memorable, and awesome. jason schwartzman doesn't miss for me, that guy. >> it was great. we got new people who weren't involved in the first one. we did the movie 14 years ago. jon hamm got involved with it. just so much fun, it was like coming back and meeting and hanging with people that you haven't seen in so long. >> jimmy: i think you and jon hamm should be in a movie together playing twin brothers. don't you get a jon hamm vibe from this man? [ cheers ] let's see you as twin brothers like -- you could be the evil twin. >> he's not quite as good-looking as me. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: don't say that out loud. >> i just saw it on everyone's tongue. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: not. no, chris -- >> it's really not. >> jimmy: no, i'm just kidding, no it is. no, please. stop. you know you're a good-looking man. and then i watched the movie "diary of a teenage girl." oh my goodness, who is this
11:58 pm
actress? >> bel powley. >> jimmy: bel powley. get used to hearing this name. >> jimmy: yes. i think she'll win something if they give out awards for i don't even know. >> exactly. >> jimmy: she's fascinating. i've never seen -- her face is so interesting. i was go, "wait, what is this person? i've never seen her." so cute but she's so good. >> it really is one of those performances where it's so vulnerable, so raw and real you just keep kind of vibrating with it going, "oh, my god, are you okay? are you going to be safe?" >> jimmy: yeah -- and the fact that you know she's an actor. it's not a documentary. she's an actor. i go, "oh, my gosh, the fact that you can act like that." it's just phenomenal. >> kristen wiig, and alex skarsgard. >> jimmy: oh, he's unbelievable. >> he's unbelievable. >> jimmy: i didn't know it was him. i go what's going on -- and then you're fantastic as well. >> thanks man. >> jimmy: and so you kind of played -- it's basically a a story about a teenage girl and just in the '70s. >> yeah, late '70s coming of age kind of thing dealing with her sexuality and all that.
11:59 pm
i'm the stepdad who is divorced from the mother but is trying to be some kind of stabilizing influence in her life. >> jimmy: it's shot really well, it's beautiful in san francisco in the '70s. we have a clip. here's chris meloni in " the diary of a teenage girl." take a look at this. >> how's your mother? >> she's doing -- >> she got fired. >> gretel? >> what? >> she what? >> she got laid off. it wasn't her fault. >> okay. what you girls may not understand about your mother is she is and has always been incapable of taking responsibility for her own life. >> don't talk about mom like that. please. >> yeah pascal, don't talk about our mom. >> dad. it's dad. and okay, fine. just stop with the inquisition. >> i'm going to go see if they have iced tea. i hate coffee. >> espresso. [ cheers and applause ] >> espresso over here. espresso. >> jimmy: fantastic job.
12:00 am
great job in "wet hot," too. we love this guy. chris meloni. [ cheers and applause ] and we're gonna stick around, we're playing catchphrase? we're gonna play catchphrase after the break. come on back everybody. it's a fun game. ♪ scott danshaw was never afraid of a good dare. ♪ or even a double dare. a dare made him a legend at brunner valley high. and a pro basketball player for 10 seconds. scott danshaw, we have three more dares for you. mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. try all three if you dare. [bong] (vo)cars for crash survival,ning subaru has developed our most revolutionary feature yet.
12:01 am
a car that can see trouble... ...and stop itself to avoid it. when the insurance institute for highway safety tested front crash prevention nobody beat subaru models with eyesight. not honda. not ford or any other brand. subaru eyesight. an extra set of eyes, every time you drive. ♪ shake it, shake it baby, come on now. ♪ ♪ shake it, shake it baby, oohh oohh. ♪ ♪ shake it, shake it, shake it, oohh. ♪ ♪ a-b-c, it's easy as 1-2-3 ♪ as simple as do-re-me, a-b-c, 1-2-3, baby you and me, yeah. ♪ ♪ a-b-c, it's easy, it's like counting up to three. ♪ ♪ sing a simple melody, yeah. make it look easy with jeans that stretch from target.
12:02 am
start this school year off right with a little extra credit from at&t. right now, switch to at&t and get $300 credit when you trade in a smartphone and buy any smartphone for $0 down. with $300 credit per line, getting ahead this school year is easier with at&t. why do you think the ripples make agrabs more?? it's the cleanripple texture. now, do you feel so clean that you would go commando? why not! how do you feel? awesome! cottonelle has cleanripple texture so you're clean enough to go commando. made a simple tripvere chto the grocery storeis anything but simple. so finally, i had an important conversation with my dermatologist about humira. he explained that humira works inside my body
12:03 am
to target and help block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to my symptoms. in clinical trials, most adults saw 75% skin clearance. and the majority were clear or almost clear in just 4 months. humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened; as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. ask your dermatologist about humira. because with humira clearer skin is possible. pwhat've we got? 5. bp 64/40 sterilize sites. multiple foreign objects in the body. tweezers. (buzz!)
12:04 am
(buzz!) if you're the guy from the operation game, you get operated on. it's what you do. (buzz!) if you want to save fifteen percent or more on car insurance, you switch to geico. it's what you do.
12:05 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that sounds fantastic. welcome back, everybody. higgins and i are here with chris meloni, star of the new movie "the diary of a teenage girl." also "wet hot american summer," you should go see it on netflix. [ light laughter ] we're about to play a game of "catchphrase."
12:06 am
but first, i need a partner. please welcome one of the biggest names in country music, our pal luke bryan! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] pumped! pumped! pumped! we're pumped! i like that. i like that. [ talking over each other ] >> i'm back. >> jimmy: he's back, now we're ready to go. here's how the game works. chris you'll start by pressing "start" on this buzzer right here. okay, and then drawing a clue from the top of the pile. get your teammate, steve, to guess the clue as quickly as possible then hand the buzzer off to the person on your right. you can make any physical gesture. you can say anything. but you can't say any word in the actual clue. if you're holding the buzzer when the it goes off, your team loses that round. first team to win two rounds wins the game. let's take our positions. >> on the board. >> now, do i get to pick and look and then press, or do i press and then -- >> jimmy: don't even start already! don't even start already.
12:07 am
you know you press that first. then you grab the clue. oh, man, oh, man. i'm out for a win. i'm ready for a win. >> "rumpelstiltskin!" >> jimmy: i can't do this. the timer is going. >> ready? "eh, what's up, doc?" >> bugs bunny. >> take a shot of -- >> jimmy: tequila. whiskey. sorry, got to love that. >> you go in a pool and you're a fat guy and make a lot of water. >> a big splash. a belly flop. >> jimmy: you ride the cyclone roller coaster here in new york. two words. this is ridiculous. he doesn't know this. >> i'm not from new york. >> jimmy: i know. gosh, an ice cream -- >> cone. >> jimmy: first word. the last word is -- >> conehead. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no. not my head. if you're on a tropical place with palm trees you're on an -- you're on vacation.
12:08 am
>> snow cone. >> jimmy: no, no. nothing to do with cones. you're on vacation. you're going to a tropical -- a a boat takes you there. [ buzzer beeps ] >> what if i would have said to you "coney island is the answer"? >> jimmy: no, no, that's not a a hint. [ laughter ] you just told him the answer. you guys got one point. this is how you react. that's how a man reacts when he wins one point? >> hot dog eating contest? kobayashi? >> jimmy: you don't know about that. [ cheers and applause ] kobayashi? name grabbing kobayashi? he doesn't know about that stuff. i can't believe it you said that. all right, here we go. here we go. here we go. >> do you start, then? >> jimmy: yeah, of course they start. here we go, buddy. we're going to do this. you ready, pal? all right, thanks. [ beeping ] >> jimmy: are we ready? all right. hiyah! >> karate, kung fu, bruce lee. "karate kid." >> jimmy: again, two words you said the first word. >> karate chop. >> jimmy: a-ha, thank you.
12:09 am
[ cheers and applause ] >> field goal, legs, meat. >> a field goal? step, a moon walk. neil armstrong. >> little smoky -- they're at weddings. >> jimmy: pigs in a blanket. >> no. it's what's in the blanket. what are they? >> jimmy: hot dogs! mini hot dogs. cocktail wieners. >> bam! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "you're fired." >> what? >> jimmy: "you're fired." >> trump. >> jimmy: all right. three words, ready? you flip a coin, you get? >> heads or tails. >> jimmy: thank you! >> slap on the wrist. [ buzzer beeps ] [ all ] [ buzzer ] >> oh! ♪ >> jimmy: we have a winner, everybody. our thanks. congrats to chris meloni and steve higgins. [ cheers and applause ] that was nice. >> how you doing? >> jimmy: we'll settle this another time. more "tonight show" after the break. stick around, everybody.
12:10 am
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ america! new yorkers love all-natural snapple and we want you to love it too! snapple's born in new york. it's one tradition that's never going out of style. snapple is more than just a drink. it's got simple ingredients: real sugar, real tea. salud! every time i open this and i hear that pop. (mouths: i love that pop!) new yorkers love it. you're gonna love it too! snapple, made from the best stuff on earth. i'm why? because it's red lobster's crabfest. and there's so much crab, so many ways. and with dishes like this luscious crab lover's dream or savory snow crab bake. i'm just getting started so hurry in and get crackin'
12:11 am
(glasses♪clinking) (ground shaking) well there goes the country club. the 2015 dodge durango. now with available beats audio. waterproofing stain. the seal you can trust. with stain and sealer in one... and easy to choose colors... exceptional beauty and protection have never been easier. thompson's waterseal waterproofing stain. available at the home depot. ♪ ♪ ♪ mum. ♪
12:12 am
♪ just tap it. ♪ i did! ♪ (yo gabba gabba!) ♪ when broker chris hill stays at laquinta and fires up free wi-fi, with a network that's now up to 5 times faster than before you know what he can do? let's see if he's ready. he can swim with the sharks! book your next stay at!
12:13 am
12:14 am
12:15 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is the reigning cma and acm entertainer of the year. he currently is in the middle of his "kick up the dust tour" in support of his latest album "kill the lights" which came out friday. it has already at number one on itunes. everyone, please welcome our pal, luke bryan, ladies and gentlemen! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> are we going to show him? >> jimmy: i have to tell everyone at home, yeah, because what happened just there is the reason why he left him hanging, because -- >> oh, gosh. >> jimmy: we played the game -- for you at home, after we played the game we were doing commercials promos for our
12:16 am
show. at the end of the promos, it's one of the best leave you hanging moments i've ever seen. >> on national tv. >> jimmy: chris went up to give him a high-five. >> i'm already nervous. we tanked on "catchphrase." >> jimmy: no, we didn't tank. we were close. >> i tanked. >> jimmy: no, you did not. you can't be nervous. you're entertainer of the year. you're used to all this stuff. >> well, "catchphrase" is nerve-racking when you're in your living room. >> jimmy: it is. >> with your family. >> jimmy: the beeping and stuff. >> put it up here and it does get a little -- >> jimmy: you were thinking after the game was over, you're still rattled. >> yeah, i'm a little rattled. >> jimmy: but i want to show everyone -- it's just one of the best moments i've ever seen. here's luke bryan leaving chris meloni hanging. watch this. we're finishing the bit. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> whoo! >> jimmy: i saw it all happen. i was like, oh i want this to
12:17 am
go -- >> that could have gone south so fast. >> jimmy is just going, "yeah, just let it happen." >> jimmy: oh, yeah. i saw it there and go "oh i'm going to let this happen. one, 1000. two, 1000." i was so happy. >> what's fun is you have all these things to talk about, and then that happens. >> jimmy: no, exactly. then you end up talking about that for 20 minutes. >> it's better. >> jimmy: congrats on everything. number one on itunes. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] that was right where -- same spot. >> jimmy: it was, yeah. [ laughter and applause ] are you on tour with luke bryan right now? >> i've often considered myself a national power player. >> i hear you. >> jimmy: it looks like you're further down the path but in the same foot. you're like back, back here somewhere. >> with less art direction. >> jimmy: with less art direction.
12:18 am
the only problem this covers, you need more you need like a a leash in front of you guys. >> yes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: congrats on all of this stuff. oh, my gosh, "kill the lights." >> it's fun. >> jimmy: gosh, you work hard. now you're doing the tour now and everything. >> yeah, we're out on the "kick the dust up" tour. we've been in new york city for a couple of days and just promoting the album. >> jimmy: how do you like new york city? do you enjoy it? >> man, i love it. it's so fun to come from a a smalltown and kind of -- you know, we're here probably 15, 20 days a year doing stuff with work, work-related stuff. >> jimmy: i just saw you signing albums backstage -- >> oh yeah, we're working, signing some digital albums for the fans and stuff. but we -- >> jimmy: you don't stop. but you're selling out stadiums. do you understand how big you are, what you've become? you're luke bryan. i mean, this is a major deal. [ cheers and applause ] >> you know -- >> jimmy: selling out stadiums. >> it's crazy. >> jimmy: a stadium. were you ever in like a bar band? >> oh, man, we did the whole bar scene. >> jimmy: what was your band
12:19 am
name? >> are you ready for this? >> jimmy: yeah. >> it's a terrible band name. >> jimmy: no, it's not. >> it's called "neyami road." >> jimmy: that's terrible. "neyami"? >> "neyami." and we used to say like your knee? sweet potato yams, "neyami." [ laughter ] >> can i borrow a pen? >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> i'm gonna write that down. >> jimmy: i'm surprised you guys didn't take off. what does that mean, "neyami"? >> where i grew up, there was by railroad, which really is not even important. >> jimmy: but you thought you'd say railroad. >> by railroad, it was the geographical midpoint between new york and miami by railroad. >> jimmy: yes! i knew that! >> everybody knows that. >> jimmy: neyami. neyami. >> what was funny is that -- >> jimmy: "neyami road." >> yes. >> jimmy: yes, that was famous,
12:20 am
the crossroads. >> anyway, but it should have been "neyami railroad." our career was railroaded, but -- so what was funny is like back when the judds were popular, people would be like, "naomi judd?" they called us "naomi road." >> jimmy: you're like "no, 'neyami road.'" you go, "it's not worth it. it should have been 'naomi road.'" >> kids out there, name your band where people can understand. >> jimmy: luke bryan is much better, yeah. >> accelerate your career. >> jimmy: how old were you when you were doing those gigs? >> we were probably 17, 18. and then i was going to move to nashville and that changed. and then we kind of kicked the band back up and we played in "neyami road" all the way -- now people are going to be looking for those albums. please don't get those albums. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i want to hear them right now, too. what song are you doing for us, tonight? >> we'll do "strip it down." it's a new single. >> jimmy: strip it down yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> hey! >> jimmy: you're playing the piano in this. >> i'm trying to help the boys out there, give them a little loving, you know? >> jimmy: oh, yeah. absolutely. this is a little like a sexy time song.
12:21 am
>> why are you looking at me right now? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. you know what i'm talking about, man. >> oh, yeah? >> jimmy: yeah! you know what i'm talking about, man? [ laughter ] >> i love how he -- he's got, like, the coolest leg cross. >> jimmy: he can do a meloni leg cross. ooh! he eases on into it. that's the way to do it. see i have no -- you don't even know what i'm doing with my legs. [ laughter ] this is actually what i'm doing with my legs. look at that. [ laughter ] that's how i sit. [ applause ] it's comfortable for me. i like the way it feels. and i don't care. you don't have to see what i'm doing. but sometimes you can just tell in my face if i'm doing it. ask me a question. just ask me a question. >> how are you doing? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: fantastic. you see what i'm saying? >> what's the weather looking like? >> jimmy: what's the weather? >> how's the weather outside? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's going to be nice. it's gonna be pretty cool. you know, it's a private joke between me and my kneecaps.
12:22 am
guys, i can't wait. it's gonna come back out. luke bryan, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] "kill the lights." "kill the lights" in stores right now! luke is gonna perform for us when we come back. stick around. let's get to the playing. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ this is my body of proof. proof of less joint pain. and clearer skin. this is my body of proof that i can fight psoriatic arthritis from the inside out ...with humira. humira works by targeting and helping to block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to both joint and skin symptoms. it's proven to help relieve pain, stop further joint damage and clear skin in many adults. doctors have been prescribing humira for nearly 10 years. humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis serious,sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure.
12:23 am
before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. visit and talk to your rheumatologist. humira. this is a body of proof! hand agitated baltic sea foam. sometimes life can get a little complicated. your sandwich doesn't have to be. oscar mayer deli fresh is made with 100% turkey breast that's sliced and sealed at the peak of freshness. it's deli quality, every time. it's oscar mayer. somei'm here to help 'embway dothink differently.flavor. you know that sandwich you always get? i can make it even better. you ever try this toasted with monterrey cheddar? you know what, why not. ok how about we spice this up a little bit? that sounds amazing. let's rock this sandwich together. subway. eat fresh. a good host, is a good host ♪ no matter where he's hosting.
12:24 am
♪ stella artois host beautifully [hero female] we're all familiar with this: axe daily fragrances, which comes in a black can. but what you wouldn't have seen is this, axe dry spray anti-perspirant. it goes on dry and keeps you dry with no visible residue. why are you touching your armpit? i was just checking to see if it was dry. [hero female] don't, that's weird. the first ever dry spray anti-perspirant from axe. okay, what is this? it's chewy. really icy. wooh. that's intense! it just hits you. its gum. no. it's totally a mint! it's disappearing as i am chewing it. where did it go? it's not a gum. not a mint. it's a totally new cool. new ice breakers cool blasts. i tried and then...breakfast made the bed/ had a swim/ scared the pants off of tim/ bought some tech off a blog/ met a bongo playing dog/ crunchy belvita breakfast biscuits
12:25 am
are made with delicious ingredients and carefully baked to release 4 hours of nutritious steady energy morning win no matter what i need you to stay focused. don't take your eyes off of the screen.
12:26 am
sfx: drill noise. sfx: puppies barking. wrestlers: ahhh!! grrr!!! owwweee! it's hard to stay focused. text message alerts from chevy let you send a text response at the touch of a button ... so you can focus on driving. this will make it a little easier to keep my eye on the road. its amazing. ♪
12:27 am
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: oh, we love this guy. performing his latest single "strip it down," once again, luke bryan. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ let it fade to black let me run my fingers
12:28 am
down your back let's whisper ♪ ♪ let's don't talk baby, leave my t-shirt in the hall like a needle ♪ ♪ finds a groove baby we'll remember what to do to drown out ♪ ♪ every distraction it's time we made it happen strip it down ♪ ♪ strip it down back to you and me like it used to be when it was an old ♪ ♪ back road with an old school beat cowboy boots by your little bare feet ♪ ♪ let it out tell me right now everything i need in them white ♪ ♪ cotton sheets dirty dance me slow in the summertime heat feel my belt turn loose ♪ ♪ from these old blue jeans we both know that we lost it somehow let's get it found strip it down down down ♪
12:29 am
♪ ♪ i wanna drop this cell phone now and let it shatter on the ground ♪ ♪ they ain't holdin' nothin' these two hands until they're holding you again ♪ ♪ oh strip it down strip it down back to you and me like it used to be ♪ ♪ when it was an old back road with an old school beat cowboy boots by ♪ ♪ your little bare feet let it out tell me right now everything i need in ♪ ♪ them white cotton sheets dirty dance me slow in the summertime heat feel my belt turn loose ♪ ♪ from these old blue jeans we both know that we lost it somehow let's get it found ♪ ♪ strip it down down down strip it down down down ♪
12:30 am
♪ oh yeah ♪ ♪ ♪ i don't wanna let you go no not tonight i just wanna love you so bad baby ♪ ♪ so let's close our eyes and strip it down strip it down back to you and me ♪ ♪ like it used to be when it was an old back road with an old school beat ♪ ♪ cowboy boots by your little bare feet let it out tell me right now ♪ ♪ everything i need in them white cotton sheets dirty dance me slow in the summertime heat ♪ ♪ feel my belt turn loose from these old blue jeans we both know that we lost it somehow ♪
12:31 am
♪ let's get it found strip it down down down strip it down down down strip it down down down ♪ ♪ ♪ strip it down down down ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: luke bryan, everybody. "kill the lights" is out now. we'll be right back, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
12:32 am
12:33 am
12:34 am
12:35 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to chris meloni, luke bryan, once again! give it up for boney james right there and the roots! the roots from philadelphia. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. i hope to see you tomorrow. good-bye, everybody! bye bye! [ cheers and applause ]
12:36 am
12:37 am
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- winona ryder. comedian colin quinn. music from beirut. featuring the 8g band with fred armisen. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] and now, here he is, seth meyers! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening, everybody, i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] all right. in that case, let's get to the news. donald trump is under fire for saying that during thursday's debate moderator, megyn kelly had, quote, "blood coming out of


info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on